1 00:00:02,021 --> 00:00:03,021 WOMAN SCREAMS 2 00:00:03,061 --> 00:00:04,661 This programme contains violent scenes 3 00:00:04,701 --> 00:00:06,861 and shocking images of the deceased from the very start 4 00:00:06,901 --> 00:00:09,821 that viewers may find distressing, very strong language from the outset, 5 00:00:09,861 --> 00:00:11,501 offensive and discriminatory attitudes, 6 00:00:11,541 --> 00:00:12,821 and scenes of a sexual nature. 7 00:00:12,861 --> 00:00:15,381 WOMAN WAILS 8 00:00:15,421 --> 00:00:17,981 What have you done?! 9 00:00:18,021 --> 00:00:20,621 WAILING CONTINUES 10 00:00:29,541 --> 00:00:31,301 SIRENS WAIL 11 00:00:33,141 --> 00:00:35,221 Monster! 12 00:00:35,261 --> 00:00:37,381 You monster! 13 00:01:30,741 --> 00:01:32,701 Oh, you little...! 14 00:01:36,221 --> 00:01:37,621 Oh, the fuck! 15 00:01:53,261 --> 00:01:54,301 Aye, aye? 16 00:01:54,341 --> 00:01:56,021 Sorry, I know. I've locked myself out. 17 00:01:56,061 --> 00:02:00,101 I was just putting something in the bin and then, click. 18 00:02:00,141 --> 00:02:02,021 So, what do you want? A ladder? 19 00:02:02,061 --> 00:02:05,821 Erm, no, I don't think I've got any windows open. 20 00:02:05,861 --> 00:02:07,941 I just need to phone my friend Stephanie. 21 00:02:07,981 --> 00:02:09,781 Remember her? My best mate? She's got a spare key. 22 00:02:09,821 --> 00:02:12,861 I mean, I've got a spare key, but guess where it is? 23 00:02:12,901 --> 00:02:15,621 In the house. Fat lot of good that is. 24 00:02:18,261 --> 00:02:20,461 Yeah, look, you'd better get in, hadn't you? 25 00:02:37,701 --> 00:02:39,421 Ah... 26 00:02:39,461 --> 00:02:41,821 Sorry, George. Got locked out. 27 00:02:41,861 --> 00:02:43,661 HE CHUCKLES 28 00:02:43,701 --> 00:02:45,781 I feel a bit stupid. 29 00:02:47,221 --> 00:02:48,701 How are you doing? How's school? 30 00:02:48,741 --> 00:02:52,701 Oh, it's college now. College! Good, well done. 31 00:02:52,741 --> 00:02:54,741 Here. 32 00:02:54,781 --> 00:02:58,261 No, but, erm... I don't know her number. 33 00:02:58,301 --> 00:02:59,981 I mean, who knows numbers any more? 34 00:03:00,021 --> 00:03:01,861 But I remember she did that charity thing with Marie. 35 00:03:01,901 --> 00:03:03,221 You know, remember? 36 00:03:03,261 --> 00:03:05,301 The kids' breakfast thing, so I thought she might have it. 37 00:03:05,341 --> 00:03:06,421 Marie's in work. 38 00:03:06,461 --> 00:03:08,501 I know. So, could you...? 39 00:03:18,461 --> 00:03:21,021 Clive? I'm busy. What is it? 40 00:03:21,061 --> 00:03:24,421 Yeah, I've got Leo from next door standing here... 41 00:03:24,461 --> 00:03:26,301 ..in his pants. 42 00:03:26,341 --> 00:03:27,581 Yeah, he's locked himself out. 43 00:03:27,621 --> 00:03:29,901 You know why that is, don't you? 44 00:03:29,941 --> 00:03:31,821 Cos Bridget was on WhatsApp two minutes ago. 45 00:03:31,861 --> 00:03:33,981 I'm trying to do my job, but it's ping, ping, ping, 46 00:03:34,021 --> 00:03:36,101 all about him from next door. 47 00:03:36,141 --> 00:03:40,141 Because do you know what she said? Guess what she saw. Bridget. 48 00:03:43,021 --> 00:03:48,101 Is that right? What do you mean, running? 49 00:03:48,141 --> 00:03:50,581 Running out of the house? Who was? 50 00:03:53,941 --> 00:03:58,021 And then what happened? Leo was running? 51 00:03:59,221 --> 00:04:01,941 Yeah, no, he said you've got his friend's number. 52 00:04:01,981 --> 00:04:06,341 That, erm... Stephanie. Yeah, yeah, that's the one, yeah. 53 00:04:06,381 --> 00:04:09,421 Yeah, no, but she's got the key, so just text it to me. 54 00:04:10,741 --> 00:04:15,101 Bridget, opposite, she says there was a man came running 55 00:04:15,141 --> 00:04:17,901 out of your house, and then you came running after him, 56 00:04:17,941 --> 00:04:20,821 but he ran off, so, er, that's how you got locked out. 57 00:04:20,861 --> 00:04:23,421 Right. Him. 58 00:04:24,701 --> 00:04:26,261 Morning. Hi. 59 00:04:26,301 --> 00:04:30,941 That was quite a night. I've never tried gooning before. 60 00:04:30,981 --> 00:04:35,021 Not as a couple. Erm, can I get you a coffee, or...? 61 00:04:35,061 --> 00:04:38,141 Yeah. Black. Thanks. 62 00:04:38,181 --> 00:04:40,941 Eddie. Leo? That's the one. 63 00:04:42,301 --> 00:04:46,901 Erm... I'd offer you some toast, but I don't have anything in. 64 00:04:46,941 --> 00:04:50,861 I wasn't expecting anyone overnight. Kind of surprised me. 65 00:04:50,901 --> 00:04:52,181 Not that I'm complaining. 66 00:04:55,821 --> 00:04:57,341 Don't you dare! 67 00:05:02,421 --> 00:05:03,621 Little...! 68 00:05:03,661 --> 00:05:08,261 That was my friend, erm, Eddie. And he was staying with me. 69 00:05:08,301 --> 00:05:13,581 And, he went, I waved him goodbye, and that's when I, er, 70 00:05:13,621 --> 00:05:16,701 took out the paper, stuff, things for the bin. 71 00:05:18,501 --> 00:05:20,101 PHONE DINGS 72 00:05:20,141 --> 00:05:21,181 Oh, well. 73 00:05:22,661 --> 00:05:23,741 Stephanie. 74 00:05:28,301 --> 00:05:31,821 I know, but I'm in my pants and I have to open up at work. 75 00:05:31,861 --> 00:05:37,061 I know you're busy, I'm sorry, but... Hold on. 76 00:05:37,101 --> 00:05:39,301 Fuck you doing? 77 00:05:39,341 --> 00:05:42,501 Erm, I got, I got locked out. 78 00:05:42,541 --> 00:05:45,101 You weirdo. 79 00:05:45,141 --> 00:05:48,621 Steph, Steph, I'll take us away at Christmas, 80 00:05:48,661 --> 00:05:50,261 I swear, I'll pay, just get me out of here. 81 00:05:57,581 --> 00:06:00,141 Right, good. Er, she has a key. 82 00:06:00,181 --> 00:06:02,821 Saul, I don't think you should be naked in front of Mr Struthers. 83 00:06:02,861 --> 00:06:04,301 Don't bother me. Yeah, well it bothers me, 84 00:06:04,341 --> 00:06:05,661 so go and get some clothes on, eh? 85 00:06:09,021 --> 00:06:10,261 Ey-yo! Hey! 86 00:06:10,301 --> 00:06:12,861 Oh.That's enough. GEORGE LAUGHS 87 00:06:12,901 --> 00:06:14,301 I apologise for my son. 88 00:06:15,821 --> 00:06:17,101 Thanks. 89 00:06:22,581 --> 00:06:24,221 Stephanie will be around about 20 minutes. 90 00:06:24,261 --> 00:06:26,541 She's wrapping something up at work and then she's coming over. 91 00:06:26,581 --> 00:06:27,701 Just put the keys in an Uber. 92 00:06:27,741 --> 00:06:29,061 Ah, she thinks they're all anti-union, 93 00:06:29,101 --> 00:06:31,541 she won't touch them, so... All right if I just wait here? 94 00:06:31,581 --> 00:06:33,501 No. 95 00:06:33,541 --> 00:06:35,621 OK, it's just for 20 minutes. 96 00:06:35,661 --> 00:06:37,701 Yeah, no, I need to get to work in a bit. 97 00:06:37,741 --> 00:06:39,141 I could just sit and watch TV. 98 00:06:39,181 --> 00:06:41,461 George, what time are you at college? 11. 99 00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:43,581 Yeah, you can't sit here with him. 100 00:06:43,621 --> 00:06:45,381 Why not? 101 00:06:45,421 --> 00:06:46,541 He's 16. 102 00:07:07,621 --> 00:07:08,821 Hey. 103 00:07:09,901 --> 00:07:13,021 God. Where'd you get the jacket? 104 00:07:13,061 --> 00:07:16,421 Oh, Clive next door, and he was not happy, let me tell you. 105 00:07:16,461 --> 00:07:19,061 His wife was always angry. 106 00:07:19,101 --> 00:07:22,181 I'm surprised they're still together after what happened. 107 00:07:22,221 --> 00:07:25,421 It was a hook-up called Eddie. He nicked my laptop and ran off. 108 00:07:25,461 --> 00:07:27,421 I ran after him and got locked out. 109 00:07:53,541 --> 00:07:54,581 I'm disgraceful. 110 00:07:54,621 --> 00:07:56,661 You're lucky. Could've been a lot worse. 111 00:07:56,701 --> 00:07:59,541 I mean, you're 60 next year. God's sake. 112 00:07:59,581 --> 00:08:01,461 I'm allowed to have fun. 113 00:08:01,501 --> 00:08:03,101 What, like this? Really? 114 00:08:04,701 --> 00:08:06,021 He's not coming back, Steph. 115 00:08:07,661 --> 00:08:12,421 Did you see on Instagram? Curtis in Italy, with her. 116 00:08:12,461 --> 00:08:13,941 So, why were you surprised? 117 00:08:13,981 --> 00:08:17,221 What happened next door with Clive Goss, Goss the Boss? 118 00:08:17,261 --> 00:08:19,021 He slept with someone else. 119 00:08:19,061 --> 00:08:20,141 Did he? 120 00:08:20,181 --> 00:08:23,341 On holiday, in a caravan park. Ew! 121 00:08:23,381 --> 00:08:27,301 I mean, imagine. I mean, what else is there to do but fuck around? 122 00:08:28,781 --> 00:08:33,341 If you think about it, they've got a son who's, what, 25? 123 00:08:33,381 --> 00:08:35,261 But the other one's only 15. 16. 124 00:08:35,301 --> 00:08:38,421 So, that age gap means marriage in crisis. 125 00:08:38,461 --> 00:08:40,981 Having another child never fixes anything. 126 00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:42,421 You eat too much cheese. 127 00:08:42,461 --> 00:08:44,581 Well, not any more. 128 00:08:45,861 --> 00:08:47,221 How's work? 129 00:08:47,261 --> 00:08:50,981 It's insane, thanks to you lot. 130 00:08:51,021 --> 00:08:53,261 What does that mean? 131 00:08:53,301 --> 00:08:56,341 Well, it's all your fault, isn't it? What is? 132 00:08:58,981 --> 00:09:03,101 We got this kid in care now, he arrived in Britain in December, 133 00:09:03,141 --> 00:09:06,101 but he's on that scheme, so there's no records. 134 00:09:06,141 --> 00:09:12,501 Says he's 14. Is he fuck 14? He's got a moustache. He's got a beard. 135 00:09:12,541 --> 00:09:14,741 He's 21, at least. 136 00:09:14,781 --> 00:09:17,661 But he says he's 14, so 14 it is. 137 00:09:17,701 --> 00:09:22,341 And he is in there with kids, and he's taking the boys out drinking. 138 00:09:23,901 --> 00:09:27,221 Don't tell me there's no drugs. There are drugs. 139 00:09:27,261 --> 00:09:31,621 But it's the way he looks at the girls. 140 00:09:31,661 --> 00:09:32,861 And he's always outside the bathroom, 141 00:09:32,901 --> 00:09:35,861 every time a girl has a shower, standing there, grinning. 142 00:09:35,901 --> 00:09:39,981 But that's just the beginning, cos this boy, this man, 143 00:09:40,021 --> 00:09:42,781 is on top of the list to be fostered, 144 00:09:42,821 --> 00:09:45,541 which means I have to process that application. 145 00:09:45,581 --> 00:09:49,701 And these foster families, they've got daughters. 146 00:09:49,741 --> 00:09:52,981 But what do I tell them? I can't warn them. 147 00:09:53,021 --> 00:09:55,341 I'm not allowed. Cos he says he's 14, 148 00:09:55,381 --> 00:10:00,341 and therefore it's a fact. So, what can I do? Nothing. 149 00:10:00,381 --> 00:10:02,301 And how is this my fault? 150 00:10:02,341 --> 00:10:06,421 He self-identifies, which you lot invented. 151 00:10:06,461 --> 00:10:07,741 Thanks very much. 152 00:10:23,301 --> 00:10:24,661 Hey, how you doing? 153 00:10:26,021 --> 00:10:28,621 Susette, love of my life. It would never work. 154 00:10:28,661 --> 00:10:29,701 Thank God. 155 00:10:29,741 --> 00:10:30,981 Hey, you. Hiya. 156 00:10:36,821 --> 00:10:37,901 Oof. 157 00:10:49,221 --> 00:10:50,261 Morning. 158 00:10:51,461 --> 00:10:52,741 What time do you call this? 159 00:10:52,781 --> 00:10:55,381 Judy had to open up, boss. I was waiting outside. 160 00:10:55,421 --> 00:10:58,461 Hello, Zee. Morning, everybody. 161 00:10:58,501 --> 00:10:59,581 Morning, boss. 162 00:10:59,621 --> 00:11:03,261 So, I finished here last night, was going to go straight home, 163 00:11:03,301 --> 00:11:06,461 then I thought, "Oh, quick little snifter at Monroe's." 164 00:11:06,501 --> 00:11:10,061 Met a man called Eddie. Tall, thin, hot. 165 00:11:10,101 --> 00:11:13,741 Chat, chat, chat. 90 minutes later, took him home. 166 00:11:13,781 --> 00:11:17,621 You didn't! I did. Wild sex. I will draw a veil. 167 00:11:17,661 --> 00:11:19,981 Then this morning we get up, go downstairs, 168 00:11:20,021 --> 00:11:23,301 he grabs my laptop, and runs into the street. 169 00:11:23,341 --> 00:11:25,421 I run after him, the door closes behind me, 170 00:11:25,461 --> 00:11:28,781 I'm locked out of my own house, stark naked. No way! 171 00:11:28,821 --> 00:11:32,101 Yeah, Stark bollock naked in the street. 172 00:11:32,141 --> 00:11:34,221 All I could do was steal a garden gnome from next door 173 00:11:34,261 --> 00:11:35,381 to hide my privates. 174 00:11:35,421 --> 00:11:36,701 THEY LAUGH 175 00:11:36,741 --> 00:11:40,181 I swear to God. I'm in the middle of the street, my arse hanging out 176 00:11:40,221 --> 00:11:42,661 and a garden gnome hiding my Kemi Badenochs. 177 00:11:43,941 --> 00:11:46,021 Wait, there's more, there's more. 178 00:11:46,061 --> 00:11:48,941 So I go next door, there's the neighbour's son 179 00:11:48,981 --> 00:11:52,421 fresh out of the shower, dripping. Oof. 180 00:11:52,461 --> 00:11:57,501 25 years old, pink, wet, topless. Well, I tell you - 181 00:11:57,541 --> 00:11:59,941 all of a sudden, that garden gnome had a fishing rod. 182 00:11:59,981 --> 00:12:01,101 THEY LAUGH 183 00:12:01,141 --> 00:12:04,741 What a start to the day. I thank you. 184 00:12:04,781 --> 00:12:06,861 CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 185 00:12:15,661 --> 00:12:18,061 Hanna, what happened yesterday? 186 00:12:18,101 --> 00:12:19,101 I had a headache. 187 00:12:19,141 --> 00:12:22,061 Well, that is what the sick line is for. 188 00:12:22,101 --> 00:12:24,181 You don't ask Tania to pass on a message, 189 00:12:24,221 --> 00:12:26,821 you phone the sick line, because I've always got it, 190 00:12:26,861 --> 00:12:28,101 if I don't have it Judy's got it, 191 00:12:28,141 --> 00:12:31,541 and we need to know properly so we can get cover. Understood? 192 00:12:31,581 --> 00:12:33,261 Yep. Good. What? 193 00:12:33,301 --> 00:12:34,981 This is Frederic. He's been waiting. 194 00:12:35,021 --> 00:12:37,061 You were supposed to interview him at half past. 195 00:12:37,101 --> 00:12:38,821 Oh, right. Right. 196 00:12:38,861 --> 00:12:42,941 Ah, first customer of the day. Morning, Melba. The usual. 197 00:12:42,981 --> 00:12:46,501 Louise, can you sort out the dame? Thank you. I'm on it. 198 00:12:46,541 --> 00:12:49,421 So, Frederico, have you worked in a bar before? 199 00:12:49,461 --> 00:12:51,021 Yeah, I did two weeks at Pinnacle. 200 00:12:51,061 --> 00:12:53,421 Why'd you leave? Well, they sacked me. 201 00:12:53,461 --> 00:12:55,701 Good start. All right, let's do this on the hoof. 202 00:12:55,741 --> 00:12:56,781 Come behind the bar. Come on. 203 00:12:58,021 --> 00:13:00,381 So, what did Pinnacle pay you? Ten. 204 00:13:00,421 --> 00:13:02,741 We pay 12, but that means you have to work for it. 205 00:13:02,781 --> 00:13:06,061 So, come on, show me. Get me a WKD, a gin and tonic, 206 00:13:06,101 --> 00:13:07,781 and a vodka lime, both with ice. 207 00:13:07,821 --> 00:13:11,061 Except we don't have any ice. Mikey, can you get the ice? 208 00:13:11,101 --> 00:13:12,421 On it, boss man. 209 00:13:12,461 --> 00:13:14,661 Basically, we're a speed bar. We don't do cocktails. 210 00:13:14,701 --> 00:13:17,661 Nearest thing we do is a blue lagoon, but not from a shaker. 211 00:13:17,701 --> 00:13:18,701 We don't have time for that. 212 00:13:18,741 --> 00:13:19,781 Just pour it straight into the glass. 213 00:13:19,821 --> 00:13:22,621 Do you know what's in a blue lagoon? No. 214 00:13:22,661 --> 00:13:24,701 Vodka, curacao, and lemonade. 215 00:13:25,701 --> 00:13:27,181 So, what do you do? Are you a student? Yeah. 216 00:13:27,221 --> 00:13:28,821 What are you studying? Philosophy. 217 00:13:28,861 --> 00:13:30,821 Ooh, philosophy. 218 00:13:30,861 --> 00:13:33,261 You know my philosophy? I can imagine. 219 00:13:33,301 --> 00:13:35,501 Fuck 'em all. I was right. 220 00:13:35,541 --> 00:13:38,301 Ah! Ah... You OK? 221 00:13:38,341 --> 00:13:39,661 Electric shock. 222 00:13:39,701 --> 00:13:41,541 Ah, Zee, will you get that fuse box? 223 00:13:41,581 --> 00:13:44,541 Told you, boss, it's happening all the time. 224 00:13:44,581 --> 00:13:46,541 You all right, Freddie? It's a bit numb. 225 00:13:46,581 --> 00:13:49,461 OK, let's do a little test to see if you were listening. 226 00:13:49,501 --> 00:13:55,261 So, tell me, Fred, in a blue lagoon, there is vodka, curacao, and what? 227 00:13:55,301 --> 00:13:56,421 I've got no feeling in my hand. 228 00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:58,941 Have I lost you? 229 00:13:58,981 --> 00:14:00,421 It really shocked me. 230 00:14:02,421 --> 00:14:05,541 OK, all right. Er, do you want a little lie down 231 00:14:05,581 --> 00:14:08,301 and a glass of water, Freddie? Hanna, get this boy a seat. 232 00:14:08,341 --> 00:14:10,101 Go on, put your feet up, young man. 233 00:14:10,141 --> 00:14:12,501 You HAVE just survived death by fridge. 234 00:14:12,541 --> 00:14:14,861 Yeah, I am a bit unsteady. Come and sit here. 235 00:14:18,261 --> 00:14:20,221 Zee, will you have a word with Hanna? 236 00:14:20,261 --> 00:14:22,021 She's taking the piss. She can't keep missing shifts. 237 00:14:22,061 --> 00:14:24,301 THEY'RE taking the piss, THEY keep missing shifts. 238 00:14:24,341 --> 00:14:25,421 All right! 239 00:14:25,461 --> 00:14:27,701 Oh, come on, no, boss, not you. 240 00:14:27,741 --> 00:14:28,741 Honestly, Zee. 241 00:14:29,781 --> 00:14:32,061 Your tribe's the most beleaguered on the entire planet, 242 00:14:32,101 --> 00:14:33,181 and what do you do? 243 00:14:33,221 --> 00:14:35,821 The one thing that is guaranteed to annoy everyone. 244 00:14:35,861 --> 00:14:38,181 You fiddle about with your pronouns, and now everyone's 245 00:14:38,221 --> 00:14:39,341 pissed off with you. 246 00:14:39,381 --> 00:14:41,501 My GP stopped prescribing oestrogen. 247 00:14:41,541 --> 00:14:44,781 But never mind that, eh? You're pissed off about one little word. 248 00:14:45,981 --> 00:14:49,141 Yeah, I know. OK. I'm getting old. 249 00:14:49,181 --> 00:14:50,741 PHONE RINGS 250 00:14:50,781 --> 00:14:52,981 Hello, sick line. Hiya. 251 00:14:54,221 --> 00:14:57,821 Frederic? You're calling in sick? 252 00:14:57,861 --> 00:14:59,901 I don't feel very well. 253 00:14:59,941 --> 00:15:01,541 The sick line is for employees. 254 00:15:01,581 --> 00:15:06,181 Yes. But according to the employment law of 2024... 255 00:15:06,221 --> 00:15:08,701 Don't you dare. ..despite the '26 amendment... 256 00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:09,861 Fucking Labour government. 257 00:15:09,901 --> 00:15:11,941 ..we've got full workers' rights from day one, 258 00:15:11,981 --> 00:15:13,821 which starts at the point of interview, 259 00:15:13,861 --> 00:15:15,541 and I was just electrocuted. 260 00:15:16,781 --> 00:15:19,221 I should get compensation for that. 261 00:15:19,261 --> 00:15:21,101 You little...! Boss. 262 00:15:23,861 --> 00:15:26,661 OK, Freddie. 263 00:15:26,701 --> 00:15:30,061 I think you should go home and consider your position. 264 00:15:36,741 --> 00:15:40,421 Thank you for the interview. I'll let you know. 265 00:15:42,181 --> 00:15:43,301 He'll let you know. 266 00:15:43,341 --> 00:15:45,621 Legacy of Keir bloody Starmer. 267 00:15:45,661 --> 00:15:48,461 You come to Manchester and run a bar, your lordship. 268 00:15:49,981 --> 00:15:51,901 Yeah? This is Leo, over. 269 00:15:51,941 --> 00:15:54,221 ON RADIO: Could you come up here, boss? And bring Zee with you. 270 00:15:54,261 --> 00:15:56,301 We've got a problem. Over. 271 00:15:56,341 --> 00:15:59,341 What have you done now? 272 00:15:59,381 --> 00:16:04,701 3 am, we're locking up, that's when you said goodbye, Zee. 273 00:16:04,741 --> 00:16:06,941 Me and Mikey head out the front. 274 00:16:06,981 --> 00:16:09,461 You slip into that quarter-turn where there's no camera, 275 00:16:09,501 --> 00:16:10,741 and that's where you stay all night. 276 00:16:10,781 --> 00:16:14,141 Oh, Zee, darling. JUDY SIGHS 277 00:16:14,181 --> 00:16:17,581 This morning, 9 am, I open up, I go upstairs, 278 00:16:17,621 --> 00:16:20,741 you pretend to arrive, and you shout upstairs, 279 00:16:20,781 --> 00:16:22,541 say "hello", and I said "hello". 280 00:16:22,581 --> 00:16:25,901 So, you... You slept in that tiny little space? 281 00:16:25,941 --> 00:16:28,941 I thought you were the clever one. What happened? 282 00:16:30,381 --> 00:16:31,701 They said they were going to kill me. 283 00:16:34,381 --> 00:16:38,221 This Polish lad moved in, and he was all right at first. 284 00:16:38,261 --> 00:16:39,821 But then three of his mates moved in, 285 00:16:39,861 --> 00:16:42,861 so it was a house share with the four of them, and one of me. 286 00:16:42,901 --> 00:16:44,301 And we'd laugh, you know. 287 00:16:47,101 --> 00:16:48,861 But then they said we were like brothers. 288 00:16:48,901 --> 00:16:50,221 Oh, they knew. 289 00:16:51,861 --> 00:16:53,461 And then it gets worse. 290 00:16:53,501 --> 00:16:56,381 They get drunk, start banging on my door every night. 291 00:16:57,981 --> 00:16:59,421 "I'm going to fuck you, little boy." 292 00:16:59,461 --> 00:17:00,741 Jesus! 293 00:17:02,181 --> 00:17:05,221 The first lad, Michal, he said, 294 00:17:05,261 --> 00:17:08,701 "I am going to fuck you until you're dead." 295 00:17:13,061 --> 00:17:15,381 From that moment on, they just want to kill me. 296 00:17:15,421 --> 00:17:16,981 They said they were going to cut my throat. 297 00:17:18,901 --> 00:17:20,261 Can't you go to the police? 298 00:17:20,301 --> 00:17:22,741 Yeah, that'll really help. 299 00:17:22,781 --> 00:17:23,781 You can stay with Ashraf. 300 00:17:23,821 --> 00:17:26,741 He's got a room, you can stay there. I'll have a word. 301 00:17:26,781 --> 00:17:29,101 All my stuff's in that house. 302 00:17:29,141 --> 00:17:30,421 Then let's go get it. 303 00:17:31,981 --> 00:17:35,741 OK everybody. Easy, does it. 304 00:17:42,821 --> 00:17:43,821 Are they in? 305 00:17:43,861 --> 00:17:44,861 They'll be asleep. 306 00:17:44,901 --> 00:17:47,501 They get in at four, sleep till four. Just keep quiet. 307 00:17:50,221 --> 00:17:51,261 OK, let's go. 308 00:18:10,341 --> 00:18:11,981 ITEMS CLATTER 309 00:18:12,021 --> 00:18:13,101 Shh, be quiet. Sorry. 310 00:18:19,221 --> 00:18:20,461 WHISPERED: Come on. 311 00:18:21,661 --> 00:18:24,461 OK. Hurry, girls, come on, let's go. 312 00:18:27,541 --> 00:18:30,781 This isn't a room. It's a box. 313 00:18:30,821 --> 00:18:33,301 They all live like this, the kids. This is what we did to them. 314 00:18:40,981 --> 00:18:42,021 Hi. 315 00:18:42,061 --> 00:18:43,061 Fuck. 316 00:18:43,101 --> 00:18:46,861 Er, good afternoon, my friend. We're not causing any trouble here. 317 00:18:46,901 --> 00:18:49,381 Just helping out a colleague. 318 00:18:49,421 --> 00:18:51,021 Just a few ticks and we'll be gone. 319 00:18:52,621 --> 00:18:54,501 You know, I've always wanted to visit Poland. 320 00:18:54,541 --> 00:18:55,861 Where would you recommend? 321 00:18:55,901 --> 00:18:57,181 Michal! 322 00:18:57,221 --> 00:18:58,821 Come on, quick! Michal! 323 00:18:58,861 --> 00:19:00,301 All right, come on, hurry. 324 00:19:03,661 --> 00:19:07,501 Who are you? In my house? Who the fuck are you, grandad? 325 00:19:07,541 --> 00:19:09,901 You try it. You fucking try it. 326 00:19:11,501 --> 00:19:12,621 You muppet. 327 00:19:12,661 --> 00:19:13,901 Ah, the lady boy. 328 00:19:14,981 --> 00:19:16,821 Going to fuck you with that big stick, lady boy. 329 00:19:16,861 --> 00:19:18,661 I'm telling you. 330 00:19:22,741 --> 00:19:26,341 I can't stop all of you, but you, Bartek, 331 00:19:26,381 --> 00:19:28,101 I can get you, you little twat. 332 00:19:28,141 --> 00:19:31,901 And they can kill me and rip my head off my body, 333 00:19:31,941 --> 00:19:37,541 but before I die I will batter your tiny little skull into pieces, 334 00:19:37,581 --> 00:19:39,181 you fucking prick. 335 00:19:40,701 --> 00:19:42,421 MEN SHOUT 336 00:19:44,981 --> 00:19:46,141 Jesus Christ, Judy! Run! 337 00:19:48,141 --> 00:19:49,861 Go, go, go, go, go, go, go! 338 00:19:49,901 --> 00:19:51,421 How have you got a gun? 339 00:19:51,461 --> 00:19:55,061 I'm licenced to kill 22 types of bird in my own back garden. 340 00:19:57,901 --> 00:19:59,381 Fuck off! 341 00:20:01,221 --> 00:20:03,181 THEY LAUGH 342 00:20:05,581 --> 00:20:07,741 What the hell, Judy? You can't just stop! 343 00:20:07,781 --> 00:20:08,941 I know what I'm doing. 344 00:20:08,981 --> 00:20:11,541 My uncle was a bodyguard to the Shah of Iran. 345 00:20:11,581 --> 00:20:13,421 Judy! Drive the car! 346 00:20:14,781 --> 00:20:16,181 Fuckers! 347 00:20:17,901 --> 00:20:19,101 Fucking hell! 348 00:20:20,621 --> 00:20:22,781 That's great! Their faces! 349 00:20:35,261 --> 00:20:37,221 ALARM KEYPAD BEEPS 350 00:21:03,541 --> 00:21:05,781 DOORBELL RINGS 351 00:21:10,421 --> 00:21:11,781 Go on, give us your key then. 352 00:21:12,981 --> 00:21:14,181 You said you had a spare key, 353 00:21:14,221 --> 00:21:16,101 you might as well give it to me, mightn't you? 354 00:21:16,141 --> 00:21:17,541 Um, well, 355 00:21:17,581 --> 00:21:20,181 I'm not gonna lock myself out again, Clive. 356 00:21:20,221 --> 00:21:21,301 Well, what if you do? 357 00:21:24,381 --> 00:21:26,021 OK. 358 00:21:26,061 --> 00:21:27,381 There you go. 359 00:21:27,421 --> 00:21:31,661 Er, what's your alarm code? 360 00:21:31,701 --> 00:21:33,501 Yeah, er, OK. 1502. 361 00:21:33,541 --> 00:21:35,461 1502. 362 00:21:35,501 --> 00:21:37,301 Oh, and my coat? 363 00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:40,861 What a day I've had. 364 00:21:42,581 --> 00:21:44,981 Thanks very much for this morning. 365 00:21:45,021 --> 00:21:47,381 It was very kind of you. 366 00:21:47,421 --> 00:21:49,941 So, do I get a key for yours? 367 00:21:49,981 --> 00:21:51,621 You wish. 368 00:22:02,541 --> 00:22:04,301 INDISTINCT CHATTER 369 00:22:04,341 --> 00:22:05,581 MUSIC THUMPS 370 00:22:09,781 --> 00:22:12,301 I mean, like... MUSIC DROWNS OUT CONVERSATION 371 00:22:26,381 --> 00:22:29,301 I'm gonna swap shifts with Donna and go upstairs, is that OK? 372 00:22:29,341 --> 00:22:30,661 OK, sure, anything wrong? 373 00:22:30,701 --> 00:22:31,861 There's a boy over there. 374 00:22:31,901 --> 00:22:34,301 Don't look. Polo shirt. I teach him. 375 00:22:34,341 --> 00:22:35,461 Has he seen you? 376 00:22:35,501 --> 00:22:37,661 Looked straight through me. 377 00:22:37,701 --> 00:22:38,821 You think he's gay? 378 00:22:38,861 --> 00:22:41,181 No chance. He's out to impress the girls, 379 00:22:41,221 --> 00:22:43,621 but if he recognises me, I'm in trouble. 380 00:22:43,661 --> 00:22:45,141 Not just at school. 381 00:22:45,181 --> 00:22:46,981 Never mind that I'm his teacher, 382 00:22:47,021 --> 00:22:48,261 he knows where I live. 383 00:22:48,301 --> 00:22:49,541 On you go. 384 00:22:49,581 --> 00:22:50,821 See you later, boss. 385 00:22:53,661 --> 00:22:56,381 OK, I'm off. 386 00:22:56,421 --> 00:22:58,621 NightNet says that gang of gypsies has moved 387 00:22:58,661 --> 00:23:00,701 to Deansgate instead, so I think we're gonna be safe, 388 00:23:00,741 --> 00:23:03,501 so I will love you and leave you, my peasants. 389 00:23:03,541 --> 00:23:06,501 Um, boss... 390 00:23:06,541 --> 00:23:07,741 Oh. 391 00:23:26,941 --> 00:23:30,021 Happy birthday, Melba. 392 00:23:30,061 --> 00:23:31,741 MUSIC CONTINUES, LAUGHTER 393 00:23:31,781 --> 00:23:34,661 Ladies. Hello, girls. Hiya. 394 00:23:34,701 --> 00:23:37,101 Hey, boys. 395 00:23:37,141 --> 00:23:39,221 No, I'm getting sugared. 396 00:23:39,261 --> 00:23:41,501 There you are! EXCITED CHATTER 397 00:23:41,541 --> 00:23:43,141 You look like you're having a good time. 398 00:23:43,181 --> 00:23:44,981 Great show. Do come in, come on. 399 00:23:50,621 --> 00:23:52,981 MUSIC BUILDS 400 00:23:59,701 --> 00:24:00,941 Ugh. 401 00:24:08,221 --> 00:24:09,621 Let's go. 402 00:24:11,701 --> 00:24:13,741 Oh, so I went to the optician's the other day, 403 00:24:13,781 --> 00:24:16,621 cos you've got to look after your eyes, haven't you? 404 00:24:16,661 --> 00:24:20,701 He says, "Miss Dixie, you've got to stop wanking." 405 00:24:20,741 --> 00:24:23,061 I said, "Why? Will I go blind?" 406 00:24:23,101 --> 00:24:27,661 He says, "No, you're upsetting everybody in the waiting room." 407 00:24:27,701 --> 00:24:30,741 Oh, you've been a lovely audience, you really have. 408 00:24:30,781 --> 00:24:32,181 But before you go, 409 00:24:32,221 --> 00:24:36,141 did you see in the news this week that poor old lady in Levenshulme, 410 00:24:36,181 --> 00:24:38,941 found dead in her flat, no one to care for her. 411 00:24:38,981 --> 00:24:41,301 I mean, what a world we live in, eh, girls? 412 00:24:41,341 --> 00:24:43,461 So, just be kind, darlings, be kind. 413 00:24:43,501 --> 00:24:45,141 Oh, for fuck sake. OK, Melba. 414 00:24:45,181 --> 00:24:46,501 Got something to say, darling? 415 00:24:46,541 --> 00:24:48,261 Don't pretend to care. 416 00:24:48,301 --> 00:24:50,501 You fucking Tory! 417 00:24:50,541 --> 00:24:53,101 I've seen you up in Hale Barns. 418 00:24:53,141 --> 00:24:55,781 You haven't just got two cars, you've got two fucking garages. 419 00:24:55,821 --> 00:24:58,261 Oh, tiny bit of jealousy. 420 00:24:58,301 --> 00:24:59,901 She's greener than Wicked, that one. 421 00:24:59,941 --> 00:25:01,381 Your husband... OK, leave it, leave it. 422 00:25:01,421 --> 00:25:02,661 ..has money... No, no! 423 00:25:02,701 --> 00:25:04,901 ..has money in care homes 424 00:25:04,941 --> 00:25:08,901 that stand women up in the bathroom and hose them down with cold water. 425 00:25:08,941 --> 00:25:12,341 This, ladies and gentleman, is Melba. 426 00:25:12,381 --> 00:25:15,901 Melba...Mediocre. 427 00:25:15,941 --> 00:25:18,301 She's not bitter at all, is she? Oh, shut up. 428 00:25:18,341 --> 00:25:20,581 I mean, I'm not saying she's old and past it, 429 00:25:20,621 --> 00:25:22,621 but she were young when Moses were a lad. 430 00:25:22,661 --> 00:25:25,061 That's not even the right fucking joke. 431 00:25:25,101 --> 00:25:27,941 "She was old when Moses was a lad." 432 00:25:27,981 --> 00:25:29,861 Not young. She was old! Go on, get out. 433 00:25:29,901 --> 00:25:32,261 You're just a bargain basement Bet Lynch. 434 00:25:32,301 --> 00:25:35,621 Come on, Melba. Do you even know what drag is?! 435 00:25:35,661 --> 00:25:38,861 This lipstick, these fucking eyelashes...! 436 00:25:38,901 --> 00:25:40,221 It's a protest! 437 00:25:40,261 --> 00:25:42,261 Come on. No, it's a scream! 438 00:25:42,301 --> 00:25:44,141 Let's get you out. It's a punch in the face. 439 00:25:44,181 --> 00:25:45,981 Shove a pie in it, darling. 440 00:25:46,021 --> 00:25:48,581 It's not Margaret fucking Thatcher! 441 00:25:48,621 --> 00:25:50,021 Get out, you skanky bitch. 442 00:25:50,061 --> 00:25:51,421 You're barred. 443 00:25:54,901 --> 00:25:56,301 That's where I met Harry. 444 00:25:56,341 --> 00:25:59,581 On that corner, right there, in 1992. 445 00:25:59,621 --> 00:26:03,021 I'd only been in Manchester just over a year. 446 00:26:03,061 --> 00:26:04,181 I never met him. 447 00:26:04,221 --> 00:26:07,621 I don't suppose you would've, cos he finished with me in 1994. 448 00:26:07,661 --> 00:26:08,821 HE CHUCKLES 449 00:26:08,861 --> 00:26:10,981 And then he phones me up 450 00:26:11,021 --> 00:26:14,421 one month later, one month to the day, 451 00:26:14,461 --> 00:26:16,421 and says, 452 00:26:16,461 --> 00:26:18,341 "I'm positive, get yourself tested." 453 00:26:18,381 --> 00:26:19,701 Remember those calls? 454 00:26:19,741 --> 00:26:20,941 Ah. 455 00:26:20,981 --> 00:26:22,541 And then... 456 00:26:22,581 --> 00:26:24,141 ..I tested positive. 457 00:26:26,821 --> 00:26:27,941 I thought I was dying. 458 00:26:27,981 --> 00:26:30,741 Well, in 1994, I was dying. 459 00:26:30,781 --> 00:26:32,941 So, I phone him back, 460 00:26:32,981 --> 00:26:34,221 answerphone. 461 00:26:34,261 --> 00:26:36,421 Phone him back again, phone him back again. 462 00:26:40,101 --> 00:26:41,941 He never picked up. Ever. 463 00:26:42,981 --> 00:26:46,261 Then he moved away went back to London, gone. 464 00:26:46,301 --> 00:26:49,101 Six years later, I find out he's dead. 465 00:26:49,141 --> 00:26:50,821 Someone just... 466 00:26:50,861 --> 00:26:52,301 ..mentions it in passing. 467 00:26:54,861 --> 00:26:56,101 Cunt! 468 00:26:56,141 --> 00:26:57,541 Now, we're not meant to blame. 469 00:26:57,581 --> 00:26:59,421 No. He was a cunt. 470 00:27:03,221 --> 00:27:05,981 You should've looked this way, darling. 471 00:27:07,221 --> 00:27:09,941 I loved you since the day I first saw you. 472 00:27:09,981 --> 00:27:12,501 That daft little Scottish lad with eyes like a fox. 473 00:27:16,221 --> 00:27:17,581 I live in hope. 474 00:27:20,181 --> 00:27:21,301 Don't, Melba. 475 00:27:27,421 --> 00:27:28,781 Happy birthday. 476 00:27:28,821 --> 00:27:31,861 Happy birthday. 477 00:27:31,901 --> 00:27:33,341 I do, though. 478 00:27:37,821 --> 00:27:40,541 Do you ever think it's coming back? 479 00:27:40,581 --> 00:27:43,221 All that shit from the '90s? 480 00:27:43,261 --> 00:27:45,461 We were despised, but you read the stuff online now, 481 00:27:45,501 --> 00:27:46,541 it sounds just the same. 482 00:27:46,581 --> 00:27:48,101 Do I think it's coming back? 483 00:27:48,141 --> 00:27:51,581 Yeah. It's back, you fucking idiot. 484 00:27:51,621 --> 00:27:53,981 Right now, it's here. 485 00:27:54,021 --> 00:27:55,901 It's a storm, it's a tide, 486 00:27:55,941 --> 00:27:57,141 it's a great big tsunami, 487 00:27:57,181 --> 00:27:59,101 and we're in the middle of it right now. 488 00:27:59,141 --> 00:28:01,261 Do I think it's coming back? 489 00:28:01,301 --> 00:28:03,501 You know, if you'd asked me in 1996, 490 00:28:03,541 --> 00:28:05,501 "What do you think 2026 will be like?" 491 00:28:05,541 --> 00:28:07,621 I'd have said, "Glory days. 492 00:28:07,661 --> 00:28:10,101 "We'll have equality, we'll have love and kisses, 493 00:28:10,141 --> 00:28:13,101 "we'll be holding hands, skipping down the streets." 494 00:28:16,221 --> 00:28:17,901 But they tricked us, didn't they? 495 00:28:19,341 --> 00:28:20,901 They just waited. 496 00:28:20,941 --> 00:28:23,421 Oh, they let us all come out, 497 00:28:23,461 --> 00:28:25,421 so now we're standing in the open, 498 00:28:25,461 --> 00:28:27,301 ready for them to shoot us down. 499 00:28:27,341 --> 00:28:28,821 You think that? Really? 500 00:28:28,861 --> 00:28:31,901 Look at me, I'm as out and as proud as anything, but... 501 00:28:31,941 --> 00:28:35,301 ..past couple of years, 502 00:28:35,341 --> 00:28:37,341 I'm a lot more careful. 503 00:28:37,381 --> 00:28:40,501 You just started a great big row. 504 00:28:40,541 --> 00:28:42,341 On Canal Street. 505 00:28:42,381 --> 00:28:43,901 Home turf. 506 00:28:43,941 --> 00:28:45,181 But out there... 507 00:28:46,461 --> 00:28:48,261 ..I used to walk into a room and just go, 508 00:28:48,301 --> 00:28:49,301 "Ta-da." 509 00:28:51,941 --> 00:28:54,901 Now I tiptoe, just in case. 510 00:28:59,821 --> 00:29:02,421 You know the awful thing? 511 00:29:02,461 --> 00:29:06,301 Now I don't have to care as much, not anymore. 512 00:29:07,701 --> 00:29:09,301 Cos I've done my bit. 513 00:29:09,341 --> 00:29:11,621 I have fought the good fight, 514 00:29:11,661 --> 00:29:14,661 very many times, thank you very much. 515 00:29:14,701 --> 00:29:18,301 HIV, Section 28, the Bolton seven, 516 00:29:18,341 --> 00:29:21,701 oh, bless them, in their little leather slings. 517 00:29:21,741 --> 00:29:23,541 I have marched. 518 00:29:25,581 --> 00:29:27,141 Now it's someone else's turn, 519 00:29:27,181 --> 00:29:29,861 one of those bright young things. 520 00:29:29,901 --> 00:29:32,221 They can man the barricades, or woman the barricades, 521 00:29:32,261 --> 00:29:33,821 or them the barricades. 522 00:29:35,381 --> 00:29:37,381 I mean, I'll be 60 next year. 523 00:29:37,421 --> 00:29:39,421 Oh, don't. 60! 524 00:29:40,461 --> 00:29:44,661 In a couple of years, I can retire and remember the golden days. 525 00:29:44,701 --> 00:29:46,901 You're kidding yourself, you know. 526 00:29:46,941 --> 00:29:50,821 If there's a war you're on the front line, my darling. 527 00:29:50,861 --> 00:29:52,941 You have trans bar staff, 528 00:29:52,981 --> 00:29:54,501 that's the battleground right there. 529 00:29:54,541 --> 00:29:56,181 Hey, I love my staff. 530 00:29:56,221 --> 00:29:59,221 And as a result, look at TripAdvisor for your place. 531 00:29:59,261 --> 00:30:02,261 There they are, regular as the morning shit, 532 00:30:02,301 --> 00:30:05,461 post after post calling you a paedo and a groomer, 533 00:30:05,501 --> 00:30:10,221 because they say you pay chemically castrated children to work for you. 534 00:30:10,261 --> 00:30:11,261 They're just bots. 535 00:30:11,301 --> 00:30:12,701 No, that's women. 536 00:30:12,741 --> 00:30:13,941 Women who are furious, 537 00:30:13,981 --> 00:30:16,901 and with good reason, but, no, no, don't start me. 538 00:30:16,941 --> 00:30:20,101 And men, grown men typing away with their big fists. 539 00:30:20,141 --> 00:30:21,541 Yeah, but it's just that, typing. 540 00:30:21,581 --> 00:30:23,621 The president of America 541 00:30:23,661 --> 00:30:29,341 has given these men permission to attack us. 542 00:30:29,381 --> 00:30:30,501 Leo... 543 00:30:31,621 --> 00:30:33,901 ..you're queer in 2026. 544 00:30:33,941 --> 00:30:35,461 You're a political act. 545 00:30:35,501 --> 00:30:37,701 Yeah, but it'll swing back. 546 00:30:37,741 --> 00:30:39,501 We do this, we go through history, 547 00:30:39,541 --> 00:30:42,181 we swing one way, we swing the other. 548 00:30:42,221 --> 00:30:44,501 Conservative then Labour, Republicans then Democrats. 549 00:30:44,541 --> 00:30:45,661 Just... 550 00:30:45,701 --> 00:30:49,101 ..just give it time, it'll... 551 00:30:49,141 --> 00:30:50,821 ..it'll settle. 552 00:30:50,861 --> 00:30:53,301 Is that what history teaches you? 553 00:30:53,341 --> 00:30:54,861 Yeah. 554 00:30:54,901 --> 00:30:57,061 It does. 555 00:30:57,101 --> 00:30:59,741 I think history's merciless. 556 00:30:59,781 --> 00:31:01,941 And it only goes one way. 557 00:31:01,981 --> 00:31:03,781 Onwards. 558 00:31:03,821 --> 00:31:06,941 It marches on, and on, and on, 559 00:31:06,981 --> 00:31:09,861 and what if this never swings back? 560 00:31:09,901 --> 00:31:13,181 What if Trump just keeps on winning forever and ever? 561 00:31:13,221 --> 00:31:16,141 How far will it go? How much will they hate us? 562 00:31:16,181 --> 00:31:17,821 Because they hate us, Leo. 563 00:31:17,861 --> 00:31:19,981 They really hate us. 564 00:31:20,021 --> 00:31:22,021 And do you know what? 565 00:31:22,061 --> 00:31:23,701 I think they've always hated us. 566 00:31:23,741 --> 00:31:27,061 Only now they don't have to pretend anymore. 567 00:31:27,101 --> 00:31:28,701 No. 568 00:31:28,741 --> 00:31:31,821 History tells us one thing. 569 00:31:31,861 --> 00:31:37,461 That blood and fire and retribution always happen. 570 00:31:37,501 --> 00:31:38,941 And right now... 571 00:31:40,581 --> 00:31:42,301 ..it's coming for us. 572 00:31:47,261 --> 00:31:48,661 ALARM TIMER BEEPS 573 00:32:44,301 --> 00:32:45,301 DOOR OPENS 574 00:32:48,941 --> 00:32:51,861 Clive, you are inside my house. 575 00:32:53,101 --> 00:32:54,421 Well, you gave me the key, didn't you? 576 00:32:54,461 --> 00:32:55,941 So, I thought I'd fix it up for you. 577 00:32:55,981 --> 00:32:58,181 You know, that, key safe thing. 578 00:32:59,781 --> 00:33:01,301 If you put this on the wall outside, 579 00:33:01,341 --> 00:33:03,181 you won't get locked out again. 580 00:33:03,221 --> 00:33:06,741 They give these to the elderly and disabled. They love 'em... 581 00:33:06,781 --> 00:33:08,381 Oh, I'm thrilled to be in the same category, 582 00:33:08,421 --> 00:33:11,061 but, Clive, I don't think you should just walk into my house. 583 00:33:11,101 --> 00:33:14,381 I think you should knock or ring the bell. 584 00:33:14,421 --> 00:33:15,541 OK. 585 00:33:22,061 --> 00:33:24,061 DOORBELL RINGS 586 00:33:24,101 --> 00:33:25,861 Better? 587 00:33:25,901 --> 00:33:27,101 Thank you. 588 00:33:27,141 --> 00:33:29,421 All right, I'll get on with it. Where do you want this? 589 00:33:29,461 --> 00:33:31,901 I was thinking, uh... 590 00:33:31,941 --> 00:33:33,861 ..about here? 591 00:33:33,901 --> 00:33:35,421 I don't know, is that good? 592 00:33:35,461 --> 00:33:36,541 It should be, yeah. 593 00:33:36,581 --> 00:33:38,541 Yeah, I'll get on with it. 594 00:33:38,581 --> 00:33:40,741 Do you ever wear any clothes? 595 00:33:40,781 --> 00:33:43,541 Yeah, I should... Yeah, go on, piss off. 596 00:33:43,581 --> 00:33:45,341 I don't need your help. 597 00:33:45,381 --> 00:33:46,981 You leave the hard work to me, eh? 598 00:33:58,141 --> 00:33:59,661 SOFTLY: Fucking let himself in. 599 00:34:01,781 --> 00:34:03,341 WHISPERS: Fucking let himself in. 600 00:34:03,381 --> 00:34:05,621 Clive bloody Goss. 601 00:34:05,661 --> 00:34:06,981 My fucking house. 602 00:34:07,021 --> 00:34:08,221 DRILL WHIRS 603 00:34:10,981 --> 00:34:12,261 Right, it's done. 604 00:34:13,381 --> 00:34:15,621 Here you are, let me show you. 605 00:34:15,661 --> 00:34:17,261 So, the key's in there, right? 606 00:34:17,301 --> 00:34:21,021 You put in 1502, open it up, there's your key. 607 00:34:21,061 --> 00:34:22,581 You put it back in, 608 00:34:22,621 --> 00:34:24,061 close it, Bob's your uncle. 609 00:34:24,101 --> 00:34:26,701 And that won't attract burglars, cos they know there's a key there? 610 00:34:26,741 --> 00:34:28,661 I mean, they can't force it open? 611 00:34:28,701 --> 00:34:30,381 Does that become a problem? 612 00:34:30,421 --> 00:34:31,581 I'll take it down if you want. 613 00:34:31,621 --> 00:34:32,941 No. 614 00:34:32,981 --> 00:34:34,181 It's up now. 615 00:34:34,221 --> 00:34:36,101 I'll get out your way. 616 00:34:38,101 --> 00:34:39,701 All right, but I got you another key. 617 00:34:42,981 --> 00:34:45,061 and I'm not charging you for labour, all right? 618 00:34:45,101 --> 00:34:47,261 Cash OK? 619 00:34:47,301 --> 00:34:48,621 If I've got it. 620 00:35:00,421 --> 00:35:01,661 You not working today? 621 00:35:01,701 --> 00:35:03,821 Oh, yeah, no, I am. 622 00:35:03,861 --> 00:35:06,221 Saturday's our busiest night. I'm working 'til 4am. 623 00:35:06,261 --> 00:35:10,661 If you can call that work, eh? Dishing out drinks all day. 624 00:35:10,701 --> 00:35:12,341 Do you know how many people I employ? 625 00:35:12,381 --> 00:35:13,821 No. 45. 626 00:35:13,861 --> 00:35:15,701 Fuck off. I do. 627 00:35:15,741 --> 00:35:17,141 It's a bar. So? 628 00:35:17,181 --> 00:35:19,941 You do not employ 45. 629 00:35:19,981 --> 00:35:21,981 There's 15 girls just rotating at the door, 630 00:35:22,021 --> 00:35:24,581 then there's managers, bar staff, security, cleaners. 631 00:35:24,621 --> 00:35:26,221 How many, are you? 632 00:35:26,261 --> 00:35:27,381 It's just me. 633 00:35:27,421 --> 00:35:28,901 Oh, well, nice life. 634 00:35:28,941 --> 00:35:31,741 And you didn't have to increase the National Insurance for 45 people. 635 00:35:31,781 --> 00:35:33,341 No, but I have to cope with maritime law. 636 00:35:33,381 --> 00:35:36,221 What's that? Ah, you see, you don't know everything. 637 00:35:36,261 --> 00:35:39,221 Under maritime law, you can sail into this country from 638 00:35:39,261 --> 00:35:40,821 Romania without any qualifications, 639 00:35:40,861 --> 00:35:42,501 and you can take my job from under my nose. 640 00:35:42,541 --> 00:35:45,501 Cos you can work as an electrician with no credentials. 641 00:35:45,541 --> 00:35:47,421 How is that maritime law? 642 00:35:47,461 --> 00:35:48,821 Because we're an island. 643 00:35:52,301 --> 00:35:55,581 I did think, if you don't mind, 644 00:35:55,621 --> 00:35:58,541 I was gonna say do you need any work doing? 645 00:35:58,581 --> 00:35:59,701 You know, in the bar? 646 00:35:59,741 --> 00:36:04,341 Cos I'm a bit short of hours and it's not a good time. 647 00:36:04,381 --> 00:36:06,021 And those boys, they cost a fortune. 648 00:36:06,061 --> 00:36:09,021 And Marie, she's always nagging at me, so I'll do a good price. 649 00:36:09,061 --> 00:36:11,101 Er, no. We're fine. Sorry. 650 00:36:11,141 --> 00:36:13,101 No, well, forget I asked. No, I'm really sorry. 651 00:36:13,141 --> 00:36:14,741 No, it's fine. It's fine. 652 00:36:14,781 --> 00:36:16,221 Just if you hear of anything. 653 00:36:18,861 --> 00:36:21,421 How's Curtis? 654 00:36:21,461 --> 00:36:23,821 Oh, I don't know. 655 00:36:23,861 --> 00:36:25,941 Ask him. Fine. 656 00:36:25,981 --> 00:36:28,981 How long's he been gone? 657 00:36:29,021 --> 00:36:30,541 Two years. 658 00:36:30,581 --> 00:36:31,981 Marie said he ran off with a woman. 659 00:36:32,021 --> 00:36:35,461 Began a relationship with someone else, yes. 660 00:36:35,501 --> 00:36:37,741 That must've been a blow. To your manhood. 661 00:36:37,781 --> 00:36:40,341 Well, it turns out I can get a blow to my manhood any time I like. 662 00:36:40,381 --> 00:36:42,501 There you go, you see? You had to make it dirty, didn't you? 663 00:36:42,541 --> 00:36:44,061 Every time. It's always sex with you lot. 664 00:36:44,101 --> 00:36:45,861 I find it revolting, you know, this time of day? 665 00:36:45,901 --> 00:36:49,421 Oh, right, so that's us, is it? That's the gays? We're all sex? 666 00:36:49,461 --> 00:36:51,181 You had a man running out of your house 667 00:36:51,221 --> 00:36:52,701 with my children sitting next door. 668 00:36:52,741 --> 00:36:54,821 OK, so I sleep around? 669 00:36:56,061 --> 00:36:57,781 I'm the one who sleeps around? 670 00:36:58,901 --> 00:37:03,141 In this room, the person who sleeps around is me? 671 00:37:04,981 --> 00:37:07,061 What are you getting at? What do you think? 672 00:37:10,181 --> 00:37:13,301 What do you mean? 673 00:37:13,341 --> 00:37:15,501 Oh, nothing, never mind. Er, 25 quid. 674 00:37:15,541 --> 00:37:17,501 Thanks. 675 00:37:17,541 --> 00:37:19,301 Was it a real woman? 676 00:37:19,341 --> 00:37:23,181 What? With Curtis. Cos these days it might not be. 677 00:37:23,221 --> 00:37:24,301 You know, Marie said, 678 00:37:24,341 --> 00:37:27,421 "If he's gay, has he run off with a man who calls himself a woman, 679 00:37:27,461 --> 00:37:28,781 "or a woman who used to be a man?" 680 00:37:28,821 --> 00:37:30,901 Cos it's all he, she, they, and them now, isn't it? 681 00:37:30,941 --> 00:37:32,141 So, we can't tell. 682 00:37:32,181 --> 00:37:33,541 Well, you know who started all that, don't you? 683 00:37:33,581 --> 00:37:36,141 No. You. 684 00:37:36,181 --> 00:37:37,541 I did that? Yeah, you. 685 00:37:37,581 --> 00:37:39,941 All of you. All this fuss with pronouns. 686 00:37:39,981 --> 00:37:41,981 It was always you lot. 687 00:37:42,021 --> 00:37:44,221 From the moment we are born, in the schoolyard, 688 00:37:44,261 --> 00:37:45,701 it's always you staring at us saying, 689 00:37:45,741 --> 00:37:46,941 "What are you, then? A boy or a girl? 690 00:37:46,981 --> 00:37:49,541 "Are you a boy or a girl? What are you, a boy or a girl?" 691 00:37:49,581 --> 00:37:51,421 Six years old, if you're not playing football, it's like, 692 00:37:51,461 --> 00:37:52,941 "What are you? Some sort of girl?" 693 00:37:52,981 --> 00:37:55,421 All our lives, "What are you? What are you? What are you?" 694 00:37:55,461 --> 00:37:57,501 And then guess what. We say, "OK, fine, you win, 695 00:37:57,541 --> 00:37:59,101 "you're right, we'll do what you want. 696 00:37:59,141 --> 00:38:01,461 "If we are so confusing, then I'll become a she, 697 00:38:01,501 --> 00:38:03,141 "she can be a he, and if that doesn't work, 698 00:38:03,181 --> 00:38:05,541 "I can become a them. What do you think? Happy now?" 699 00:38:05,581 --> 00:38:07,061 Well, guess what? No, it's all, 700 00:38:07,101 --> 00:38:09,581 "How dare you change? How dare you be different? 701 00:38:09,621 --> 00:38:11,141 How dare you not know?" 702 00:38:11,181 --> 00:38:13,301 We did exactly what you wanted, 703 00:38:13,341 --> 00:38:15,901 and you still don't fucking like it. 704 00:38:17,541 --> 00:38:19,061 And I will have my change, please. 705 00:38:23,341 --> 00:38:24,541 please, Clive, thank you. 706 00:38:24,581 --> 00:38:27,421 Well, I'll go and get it. Yeah, you do that. 707 00:38:57,141 --> 00:38:58,621 Look, all right, I didn't... 708 00:38:58,661 --> 00:39:01,101 Oh, no, no, no. It's all my fault, apparently. 709 00:39:02,181 --> 00:39:05,141 I mean, isn't everything? So, you have a nice day. 710 00:39:05,181 --> 00:39:06,941 I do need a spot of work. 711 00:39:09,501 --> 00:39:11,061 There's some dodgy wiring at the bar. 712 00:39:11,101 --> 00:39:12,861 So, yeah, thank you. 713 00:39:12,901 --> 00:39:15,181 I-I'd be very grateful. 714 00:39:15,221 --> 00:39:17,741 Yeah, well, no mates' rates. 715 00:39:17,781 --> 00:39:20,941 Well, we're not mates. 716 00:39:20,981 --> 00:39:22,621 All right, well drop us a text and we'll sort it. 717 00:39:22,661 --> 00:39:25,781 You know, I mean, if I've got time, like. 718 00:39:25,821 --> 00:39:27,981 OK. 719 00:39:28,021 --> 00:39:29,501 Thank you. 720 00:39:35,861 --> 00:39:37,261 MUSIC THUMPS 721 00:39:43,341 --> 00:39:45,261 INDISTINCT CHATTER 722 00:39:56,101 --> 00:39:57,341 MUSIC STOPS 723 00:40:36,661 --> 00:40:38,021 MUFFLED ARGUING 724 00:41:08,941 --> 00:41:13,541 MUSIC: Unholy by Sam Smith ft Kim Petras 725 00:41:34,301 --> 00:41:36,221 EXPLOSION 726 00:41:36,261 --> 00:41:37,541 SCREAMING 727 00:41:51,461 --> 00:41:54,861 AUDIOBOOK: River said to Lamb, "'I've always fancied you, sir." 728 00:41:54,901 --> 00:41:58,621 Lamb unzipped his dirty, sweaty trousers. 729 00:41:59,661 --> 00:42:01,541 "Eat this, River." 730 00:42:01,581 --> 00:42:04,701 And River nuzzled deep into the unwashed fold. 731 00:42:04,741 --> 00:42:06,021 MUSIC RESUMES 732 00:43:07,261 --> 00:43:08,941 SCREAMING 733 00:43:16,261 --> 00:43:17,501 VIDEO: Please! 734 00:43:19,381 --> 00:43:20,381 MUSIC RESUMES 735 00:43:35,741 --> 00:43:37,101 GRUNTING 736 00:43:41,581 --> 00:43:42,861 GUNSHOT 737 00:44:02,221 --> 00:44:03,941 Fuck. 738 00:44:03,981 --> 00:44:05,101 Fuck. 739 00:44:08,501 --> 00:44:12,141 I swear it gets madder and madder, that family next door. 740 00:44:12,181 --> 00:44:15,141 George. Get here. 741 00:44:15,181 --> 00:44:16,341 You kept secrets. 742 00:44:16,381 --> 00:44:18,901 If you're hiding things from me now. 743 00:44:18,941 --> 00:44:20,181 So, you won't tell her next time? 744 00:44:20,221 --> 00:44:23,501 Tonight's the night. I am so gonna get rimmed. 745 00:44:23,541 --> 00:44:25,501 Maggie, Maggie, Maggie, out, out, out. 746 00:44:25,541 --> 00:44:26,981 You can look down on women. 747 00:44:27,021 --> 00:44:29,141 Fuck off. Go on, Clive. 748 00:44:30,181 --> 00:44:31,741 Cop a load of this. 749 00:44:31,781 --> 00:44:32,901 I still love you. 750 00:44:32,941 --> 00:44:35,221 I think you lot are so full of all your freedoms, 751 00:44:35,261 --> 00:44:36,741 you don't know when to stop. 752 00:44:36,781 --> 00:44:37,941 THEY CHEER 753 00:44:42,141 --> 00:44:43,821 You all right? 754 00:44:43,861 --> 00:44:46,661 Sit at home with a bad dad, and you're as closeted as ever. 755 00:44:49,861 --> 00:44:51,221 I am so scared. 756 00:44:54,701 --> 00:44:58,381 You terrify me. 757 00:45:00,821 --> 00:45:03,021 Yeah, like it creeps through the walls. 758 00:45:03,061 --> 00:45:04,701 Subtitles by Red Bee Media 759 00:45:06,061 --> 00:45:07,541 Oh, fu...